She picked up the crumpled newspaper it was written on, and smoothed it out to find that it was part of an ad in the classifieds. It read:
Esmeralda’s Cave: readings, potions, charms, and spells. Mystical answers to your problems. 45 S Main, Basement.
May ripped the ad out from the larger paper, and put it in her back pocket. She couldn’t help but find a correlation between her confusion and heartbreak now and the introduction of that mysterious mirror into her life. Hopefully this Esmeralda had some insight for her. She wanted to try and get there at her first opportunity, but wasn’t sure when that could be-- she didn’t want to ask someone for a ride to a voodoo shop.
She rubbed her eyes vigorously and decided it was time to be a big girl and get to class. Class had only started five minutes ago. The thought that Ethan might have changed his mind was too tantalizing to resist dwelling on, and it filled her mind with hope as she headed towards the classroom where he would be sitting.
May ducked quietly into the classroom, where the students sat in silence doing “sustained silent reading.” Mrs. Nelson looked up as she entered, and nodded in recognition. Ryan had done exactly what he’d said.
Ethan and Ryan both watched her as she walked towards her seat. Ryan’s look showed concern; Ethan’s was a mix of regret, apology, and impatience. She smiled at Ryan to reassure him, and then wiped her face clean of any expression at all as she looked back at Ethan.
He quickly grabbed her left hand as she was walking past. She looked down at him expectantly. He only mouthed the words, “Please,” and “Sorry.”
May took her hand back and shook her head, mouthing, “Don’t,” before she looked away and sat down. Pity was a very poor substitute for the devotion she was after.
The entire class hour was spent reading, but May didn’t get through a single paragraph. She was trying to choose her position. She wanted to just be mad at Ethan—mad at him until he gave up his stupid, self-imposed romantic exile-- but that wasn’t going to grant her the closeness she craved. He had said he wanted to be with her more, but nothing romantic. Should she respect that and be happy just in his presence? Or should she be outspoken in arguing her case? No answer came to her.
Class ended, and she stayed in her seat for a few moments. The rest of the class was filing out around her; she looked back at Ethan’s desk and saw that he sat there still. He was watching her intently. She looked back at him. They sat there for a few long moments, none of the other students seemed to be aware of the tension as they walked past. When they were only two people left in the room, he got up and walked to her desk, kneeling down beside her.
“Please don’t be upset.” He pleaded.
“I’m not sure how else I’m supposed to feel.”
“Just—let’s just hang out some more. I really like being with you.” He sounded like he was trying to convince her.
“You just don’t get it at all, Ethan. Why would I do that to myself?”
“But you said you like me…” he trailed off, seeming confused.
“Of course I like you! I like you a lot. But you aren’t interested in anything more than hanging out, and I am. It would be like torture to spend time with you because I would always be wanting more.” May didn’t hide the anguish in her eyes.
Ethan looked back at her, and she was surprised to see his tortured expression. Then suddenly, he was kissing her. She wasn’t sure how it happened, but she only let out a small squeak of surprise before she had her hands intertwined behind his neck and was kissing him back. They were both so involved, that neither of them noticed when their teacher entered the room again.
“Children, please.” Mrs. Nelson snapped.
They broke their kiss and both stood immediately. May hid her face in embarrassment as she grabbed her things to leave. Ethan was more suave.
“Aw, Mrs. Nelson,” he smiled his big smile at her, “We were having a moment.”
“Have it somewhere else. I’ve got freshmen coming in next hour, I don’t need them getting all hot and bothered watching the two of you.”
May was mortified, and started toward the door ahead of Ethan. He grabbed his things, then dashed to catch up with her. He grabbed her hand and held it as they walked, and as they exited the door he stopped her and gave her one more quick kiss.
“Okay?” was all he said.
“Okay,” was all she could answer.
They parted ways at the door, their classes being in opposite directions.
“I’ll find you at lunch,” he called to her.
May walked in a daze, not noticing anyone or anything among the throngs of students in the hall. Her heart was thumping away. My first kiss. She put her hand up to her lips. She felt like they had to be glowing or something, surely anyone who looked at her would be able to see there was something different about them now.
She had been right not to consider her encounters in the mirror as the real thing. They felt like daydreams compared to this feeling now. She couldn’t get over the knowledge that here, in reality, where Ethan would remember just as well as she, they had kissed. She still didn’t know where things stood with him, and it seemed to her the kiss was a bit of a concession on his part. At this point, she honestly didn’t care. She was thrilled, and she was so glad that Emily was in her next class. Even for just three minutes, it was killing her to keep it to herself.
May entered her physics classroom and joined Emily at the lab table they shared. She was beaming as she sat down. Emily looked at her, knowing immediately there was something to tell. “Well?” she pressed.
“He kissed me, Emily!” May whispered excitedly.
“Wh- woah!” Emily was stunned, but then she paused. “Wait. Who are we talking about?”
“Who?” May couldn’t believe there could be any confusion. “Ethan!”
“Ethan? Ethan kissed you? But what does that mean?”
“I don’t know for sure,” May confessed. Then she spilled everything that had passed between them; the declaration of his feelings, then his stated desire to remain platonic, her reaction, and his apology.
Emily was unsurprised that Ethan had tried to avoid any romantic connection at first. “Honestly, May. Have you ever heard of anybody going out with Ethan? Ever?” May admitted that she hadn’t. “It’s hard to even picture, actually. He is such a playboy.”
May felt a little pit in her stomach when Emily said that. “That is true, he doesn’t really seem boyfriend material.” She buried her head into her folded arms on the lab table, “but I really want him to be! I’m so confused!”
“I’m confused, too!” Emily exclaimed. “This is all happening so quickly. May—three days ago, you had never said more than three words together to the guy, and now look at you! Don’t get me wrong, it is totally awesome. It’s just so weird, though!”
May sat up, as though what Emily just pointed out had never occurred to her--probably because it hadn’t. With her extra interactions that were happening outside of time, she had lost track of the timeline in reality. “Woah, you’re right…” May trailed off as she contemplated how the real world was seeming just as unbelievable as the fact of the existence of the mirror.
“Okay, May” Emily commanded. “I don’t care how you do it, but you have to find me after lunch and tell me what happens.”
The next hour was American History, and it was torture. She watched the clock as the minutes ticked agonizingly slow around the clock. Finally, the bell rang for lunch. May really wanted to go hunt Ethan down, but he had said that he would find her. So she tried to keep herself looking composed as she headed to her locker.
She rounded the corner, and saw Ethan leaning against the locker next to hers. He wasn’t waiting for her, though. Three girls surrounded him, and the four of them were talking. Laughing. Flirting. May felt like someone had just kicked her in the stomach. What was Ethan doing? It was only lunchtime, but she felt like she had swung the complete continuum of emotions with him about three times today. Were her feelings some joke to him? She wanted to have a fit right there and embarrass him, but she knew it would only be her that was embarrassed in the end. She decided then she wouldn’t be weak, and she wouldn’t let Ethan see how he was hurting her.
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